In recent times, a noticeable trend has emerged among young women in Sweden, diverging significantly from the country’s long-standing promotion of gender equality and dual-income households. A movement has taken root on social media, celebrating the concept of quitting traditional employment in favor of lifestyles typified by being “stay-at-home girlfriends” or adopting a softer, more nurturing approach to living. This trend raises the question: why are Swedish women, who once stood as paragons of career ambition, now embracing this new identity?
Vilma Larsson, a 25-year-old woman from Sweden, exemplifies this trend. After working in a grocery store, care home, and factory, she made the decision to quit her job a year ago. Now, she describes herself as a stay-at-home girlfriend and claims to be happier than ever. “My life is softer. I am not struggling. I am not very stressed,” she expresses, highlighting that her boyfriend, who works remotely in finance, provides her with a monthly stipend. Vilma often spends her time engaged in leisure activities, such as going to the gym, enjoying coffee dates, or cooking. The couple enjoys the freedom to travel, with their current winter retreat being in Cyprus.
The soft girl phenomenon, a social media microtrend that traces back to the late 2010s, has begun to resonate particularly within Sweden. The term is used prominently on platforms like Instagram and TikTok, where young women adopt an identity that emphasizes femininity and nurturing roles over career ambitions. When surveyed by Ungdomsbarometern, Sweden’s leading annual survey on youth trends, many young people, aged 15 to 24, indicated that this lifestyle choice gained traction as they predicted it would continue into the next year. Interestingly, the trend is reportedly catching on even among younger school-aged girls, with some expressing aspirations to embody this soft girl identity.
Johanna Göransson, a researcher at Ungdomsbarometern, explains this transition as a reaction against the previously dominant “girl boss” mentality that placed overwhelming pressure on women to succeed in all aspects of life. She notes that while official statistics on the trend’s demographics remain scarce, the discussion has spurred significant media coverage and debate across various political forums in Sweden. This includes contributions from influential figures such as Gudrun Schyman, co-founder of the feminist party Feministiskt initiativ, who cautions against the notion of women relying on their partners for financial support and emphasizes the importance of self-sufficiency.
Yet, this soft girl lifestyle has not lacked its share of controversy. The Sweden Democrats party has maintained a favorable view of the trend, asserting that individuals should have the freedom to choose how they live their lives, including opting for traditional roles. The party’s representatives argue that women still possess ample opportunities to pursue careers if they desire but should be entitled to embrace domesticity without judgment.
Underlying this phenomenon may be broader societal factors. Research indicates rising stress levels among young people, and many youths today are shifting their focus toward wellness and leisure as primary life goals, influencing their perception of work and success. There’s also a possibility that this trend reflects a cultural fatigue with the expectations traditionally placed on women regarding career ambition and success, especially in a society that has extensively promoted gender equality.
The implications of this trend extend beyond personal lifestyle choices; they bring to light the ongoing issues regarding work-life balance in Sweden. Despite government efforts to promote gender equality, statistics reveal that women still bear a disproportionate burden of household responsibilities compared to men. Many women take extended parental leave and may experience higher rates of stress-related sick leave, showcasing a disconnect between the ideals of gender equality and the reality of domestic roles.
Vilma’s perspective emphasizes this historical experience of her family, where she observed her mother, sister, and grandmother facing considerable stress from balancing careers and domestic life. Such reflections suggest that for some, the soft girl approach serves as a means of opting out of the pressures that come with conventional career expectations.
In summary, the soft girl phenomenon among Swedish women reflects a complex interplay of social dynamics, personal choices, and broader cultural shifts. While it offers a glimpse into the changing identities of young women, it also compels a reevaluation of Sweden’s commitment to gender equality in an evolving societal landscape. The ongoing discussions surrounding this trend may serve as a catalyst for addressing unseen challenges that continue to persist, ensuring that the pursuit of happiness and fulfillment can harmoniously include both personal and professional aspirations.
